PQ on Earth

Flora & Fauna *

2010-01-11T17:01:00.025+08:00

Feeling low low low low low low low... Job hunting really takes alot of perserverance and energy. So at times like this i will go online see some inspirational quotes to perk myself up abit. This led me to doing something -----> CLEAR ITEM: FISH TANK PRUNING

Frustrated with the green algae that floods my tank panel, i google for more infor. & eventually dive my hand in to wipe e stubborn "grease" off! With occasion whimpering due to the fresh cuts on my fingers (DAM U 牛奶罐!). Happen to go parkway @nite so bought new foreground plants(the ones sprawl across the gravels like long grass seen in the photo below) in hope to create shelter + more opportunity for my shrimps to roam about. E previous plant i bought all goyak already so monitor progress of this new member. I totally adore the new look! Now i need to google to see if there are other more natural ways to keep my red plants red.

Photo 1: Beautiful tank with new foreground plants

As usual the pinks are typical scavagers that are always seen swimming near the water surface, red noses are aslp together with the malnourished tetras(hence can't be seen). Total fish count: All species are in packs of 5 cept the 2 orthos (1 which has an exceptional big fat tummy i realised today). The unique yellow-black stripe snail that i got from the farm is still cute and small - Stay that way my little bumble bee! As for THE OTHERS: the regular plant snails that grow so fast and more tiny ones still keep popping out from nowhere. OMG. Previously i had even tempted with thoughts of makg em into faux escagot dishes or what melting them with salt(yeh right~). OH YA and the two shrimps really kept appearing now that the gravel is littered with more greens. Yippie!!! Unfortunately my cleaning is so thorough e greedy fat ortho is swimming frantically left right trying to find a thick green spot to suck on. FAT HOPE.

Woah the fishing trip is really happening as discussed @Stadium BK after Spore vs Iran! Really wana go but am oredi quite tied-up this few weeks. HmMmm... how how how. With Wq's dinner, rj/rene bday, shuxin's wedding, Ah MEI's concert, ching's burfday in the line up till 7feb. Guess now i know the date which i may possible make it for the night activity. HmmMm..

Oh polly is currently undergoing a new diet & pumped with steriods. Somehow as Kxxx commented she now walks with a "hop", 明显 happier and lively w/o all the itch & flakes. Still abit fussy with her food but i'm not gg to barge. Eat or starve. In e end i fed her today she also 乖乖就范. Like her alot when she finishes her food. Sweet li' thing^^ guess it's also because alot of ppl are touching her now which really lifts her spirits. See how much pretty she is!

In photo: Polly(lower), Zig(middle), LYG (up)

I figure blogging will be a good way to practise writing. At least something is better than nothing.

*Titled: Flora and Fauna- So it doesn't just refer to flowers and sth else. "Flora" is referred to plants while "Fauna" means for all of the animal life. Cause initially i still thot the title is not right but i see now it's more than appropriate.

Lurve Avril Lavigne's Canon Commercial

2010-01-07T15:54:00.003+08:00

Ya i tink this one's really apt.

Between sluggish & enlightened

2009-12-16T17:11:00.008+08:00

Making some changes with my blog like adding relevant pictures than using the ones that came with this template. I was thinking "what the heck", and dive in to clear some spider webs off this forgotten website. Oh my x'mas is coming and ppl like fang, ching , dl, shan will all be on holiday.

Webcam with yuling the other day, she's all burnt and sick. Was pretty fun. Been sick myself recently also cant go around spreading the germs. Been doing alot of email sending, revamping coverletter recently since i had more time on hand. OMFG im really gg to rot soon but i will countdown to the day i step out in my office wear SOON>

With initial hopes to take over the kopitiam, well well i guess all these ideas and what not is officially banished on 27th Nov. What a night that was. Am truly glad i got to leave the house since i had to go suntec for my 3rd test but was overall too devastated to do much. As what kang put it " treat it like a parenting lesson learnt the hard way". Indeed... I'm also at fault for not explaining things proper but least I know where I stand in this uncanny li' conventional family of mine. Feeling I don't know the directions is not an excuse anymore. Gotta start somewhr in order to know whether i like it anot hur. Got to suck it up and try to avoid the -ve influences of LYG n Queen Amidala.

I recently learnt that I don't have to be earning big bucks to be happy (I will simply save more and I can be filthy rich!). Earning a living through honest and conventional means is a feasible way of life too! Why why why do i only see it now. It's funny hur since I always thought I should be doing my part directly to help amidala lead a workless life. It's complicated. Life may be happier this way too (Haha). I can always start at entry level and work my way up. Discrimination steming from the roots is just not helpful so I'm going to have to take things in my stride! Be it something out of my core studies, I'm never going to be an engineer anyway. It's just not my cup of teh-O-gao-siu-dai. I'm leaving my mind and doors wide open so may my x'mas wish come through this year!

Yeh one step closer to getting there...

2009-04-28T22:38:00.003+08:00

i really love spider solitare when im in the "thinking mode". And i cant get enough of it. Now is a good example, when playing it beats watching tv. Woah.

Khim's wedding @marina mandrain

2009-04-26T00:49:00.004+08:00

i realise that 4.5 glass of white wine is enuff to kick me off my seat. i was busted once again. In a table full of tkgs girls whom i haven meet in YEARS i think i entertain em quite abit once i went past 2 glass.

Diana seems shocked.

omg valene is fucking the same la. hahahaha... We juz keep laughin over silly things i cant even recall what now. Was dam full from all the outbursts.

ok i never knew mascara is this difficult to wash off. why r u all laughing @ ME!!!! ah.

i can still make my own way back. cept my heels r killing me. omg the girls are all dam chio. Amazingly there's this superb exhibition gg on our ballroom level as well. This is my fave picture. I wouldnt mind this painting in my future home. kekeke. Jialin looks the same but she looks FIERCe when she's all red. Evelyn omg is associated wit Dong Su Hua. Yiwen is another chiobu. omg omg omg. Seok is married with a 1.5yr old kid. i canot imagine myself in her shoe AT ALL.

ok this is a great nite! i got em all to punch in my no.s cos i cant do it promptly as i try to pry diana's fingers away from my wine glass.

Khim is gorgeous. A couple that looks good together. Blissful wishes : }

P.S.: What the hell is dat corner table still intact when every1 else is leaving?! Disperse now for god's sake! Haha. Ok im LEAVING!! (becos diana n jialin kips bugging me to. >.<)

do what you love, love what you do

2009-04-06T20:14:00.005+08:00

This marks the last week of my stint @sungei kadut. Things seems to be falling into place. Recieved this msg from ching at 8.21am "Pei! Jiayou! Final week le! New horizon awaiting u! :)"

hahaha Hell Yeh.

Too bz to get out for a bite. I told jimmy i'll cook noodles today. TMD canot find any eggs. But nv-the-less i still added my personal touch to it: heat the pot, add oil, pour in a teaspoon of garlic (fried ones canot find raw ones bobian), add water, boil, drop in the noodles. Vvvooow la~ Tea tarik for him & i went to itchy mouth went to try this coconut milk coffee on the rocks. YUCKS. most digusting. Haha added too much chilli padi ended up both us eat until 一把鼻涕，一把眼泪(ok only i eat until teared)。This is what i got from my own office pantry. huat right.

At 4+pm, jimmy just suddenly stand behind my seat and gave me a firm handshake. 他说： "不见了，goodluck".

On the train ride home, jimmy gave his usual smiley and said "Woah not bad your last few days still can get to eat the noodles you cook". Den he went on bout the renovations of his sis's, can totally see pride brimming from his face. Ya i wud haf die-ed if i nid to prep for 2 upcoming exhibitions & house reno @ the same time. Ya den he told me my soup was tasty n dat he took the last egg in the morning.

Go on jimmy karoshi~ have a good time with your little dear. I too will find my own path.

2009-04-02T22:07:00.003+08:00

Woah counting down. When they ask me the reason why, i juz raise my shoulders. As much as im fergetful ( i ferget why i come to make certain decisions sometimes but im normally correct).

Career planning time~~~~ WHat do i want & what i like to do?

Watching American Idol, particularly like this line tat one of the contestant said "i like you, keep it real". Ya, i think its important to keep it real.

2009-03-29T16:50:00.008+08:00

Am i trying too hard?

Its been up n down for the past 2 weeks. 2 more weeks to go. To me its not stale cheese, think im the one who became stale. ARghhh. Realise im doing the same things and feeling the same on every sunday. Did the Mon-Sat actually flew by me or sth?! its lyk im jumping from one sunday to the next. i realise im not so environmentally friendly anymore. i dun seem to fug care about where my scrap papers go nor my plastic bottles end up in. EEeeee....

Looking back, woah so i've been feeling down since january?! omfg. this is crazy. i totaly love my (young) boss n i totally totally love jimmy to bits. Aiyah wake up your idea! Stop thinking bout it. It's like im doing this half-heartedly now. Get a grip!! Stupid kang juz kip saying that "no nid work forever". yeh yeh right.

I dreamt the nite before(fri) that a new bathtub we got juz caught fire from the base(like it became a cooking pot>! ) Its almost like those horrid fairytales whereby the witch wans to brew some nasty concoction. Den ytd (sat) i dreamt that i had to bathe n change so i had to find an available room to do it but im stuck in the corridors. End up my colleagues were the tenants in the building. REally weird.

Ok i cannot find my certs. where are they manz.

Friday played mj @ching's. Diana pang seh again. In the end was me, ching, guang yi n sumei. Dear fungus sent me over to ching's. Bought deserts. So she did her work while the 4 of us play. Ended the game at 1+. Went to cook prata after that--> 5 pieces, 1 canned curry, 3 eggs = 3 fools who end up so full can puke. After that nuah @ sofa chit chat; guang yi was telling us all bout his chiong nites n hip PA happenings. At 4am, me n ching proceeded to her room to brush up & we continue until 5am! omg donkey years nv sleep at this kind of unholy hour already. Was damm cock cos tokking to ching den at one point i thot she dozed off so i juz dint continue my sentence den she suddenly speak again so we juz kip laughing our heads off cos we juz waited for each other in silence for more den 10 seconds. DUMB. Got awoken the next day by yali's pone call at 12.45PM! The rest of the day feels lyk i got a hangover.

Fang came over to pick me n ching at 1.30pm sharp to go eat my house downstairs the teochew miu. The 3 of us ate $24!! i was super DL they gave us such a big plate of duck. Almost wanted to flip the table when the auntie say its $30 or sth. in the end really canot finish la had to DB the rest. Ching loves the teh below my place. We were discussing bt the next week's and the coming months' plans and finding ideas to a new angmoh name for me. Fang seems to like Shandy Tian alot. >,<

After that i came back up, turn on power 98 and type type type again on my compaq pressario CQ45. Asked yeebing about Cody and Codie. He says Cody confirm all the return emails i will be addressed as "Mr". hmmm...

Next up on the menu was the 8pm play @NLB (participants include: me yuling, lisi and her little big-eyed dragonboat junior). Before tat when i reach kx n yuling was still eating at Han's and kx excitedly call me Zann Tian. I canot comprehand "The importance of being Earnest". Was focussing my 110% attention trying to catch what they say n squinting my eyes to see the tiny characters manoveur about the stage. Too chim already but its a good play nonetheless, juz not my type. Vaginal monologue and Asian boys is more for me. More straightforward and candid & i definitely can catch what's going on. Had supper with yuling & LS at the hawker centre opposite.

Chicken is gg to move out soon. Maybe i should turn my room into a backpackers' dorm. Can take 12-16 beds lo. huat man. hahaa.. As i walk down joo chiat rd after my driving juz now, i see this quite huat backpackers hostel (http://www.betelbox.com/). Woah but locals canot stay. Sobz sianz. Thot can org some kind of get away. Looks really good. check it out. haha.

Mood:

2009-02-24T01:11:00.001+08:00

i'm sorry for making all of u worried bt me

:- (

2009-02-04T22:11:00.004+08:00

Fug.

Kana pawn kana pawn, kana pawn till sibei song.

It's tough playing chinese chess..the AI beat me shitless.

Ass.

2009-01-18T14:08:00.011+08:00

Been feeling stressed up lately and i dont like it, at all. Like Ms Tng (my PE teacher from TKGS) whose line inspired me with "Its all in your mind." Ya i know mind over body. Or perhaps my state of mind is affecting my body. MUST BE. Keep waking up b4 my handpone buzz, in the middle of the nights and all, not sleeping well. oh boy. Told ws what im currently doing. He said "woah, not ur forte". EEKS! Wah lao got so hard anot! GET it togther!!

Did a personality test & reconfirmed again that im a picasso in the making... I AM.. DA ARTIST. (>,<) Lyk real~

ISFP: "Artist".

Interested in the fine arts. Expression primarily through action or art form. (since tkgs times i already know im inclined towards artistic expressions. BuHAHA)

They are shy and retiring, and are not talkative. (Ya im an introvert remember?)

They are not big on commitment. (HOW TRUE--> Common trait of e youngest in the family~)

5% of the total population.

Woah i see already also peng. Artist canot earn $$! (or at least me la) MAybe i sud work with animals. Dont nid tok so much. Go scoop elephant dung. But than again, we all need time to adapt to the foreign. Anyways, haven been to redhill for 1-2 months already. I totally miss pao-ing kopi! How much work am i really doing neh? Time to power up and be less of a SNAIL! okay, time to get a PLANNER. Find of a new direction to work towards.. lemme see... think this is not bad--> "Complete MY work in the office so I can give MY 100% to ur family, friends and leisure". Cause work-life-balance is something i feel for strongly. But its pretty messed up now. I muz draw that balance. Firm knowing what i have to do, what needs to be done, and ASK. Stop being a nuah sai. "One must realise that the whole responsibility of his present life as well as his future depends on him n him alone."

Sim says:
i guess u juz fulfil ur obligations at work
Sim says:
n meantime find out wat u good at

{pq} says:
u think its cos i dun like wad im doing?
{pq} says:
i also duno wad the hell im gg to be good @

Sim says:
i tink tat's for u to find out for urself lor
Sim says:
be honest to urself lor n dont shy away from life itself

Woah woah woah. HL always give "jing yu liang yen". HUAT. i like.

海角七号

2008-12-13T15:20:00.014+08:00

Previously when i was in taiwan, i think the first movie i heard about or should i say throughout the trip was the one and only 海角七号. As usual im not the kind whose into the hype of the moment. Watched it on thurs night at cine wit grace,ws,kang. okaY i really lyk the show alot man. i think it has a superb soundtrack. Finally something worth all the anticipation. I think the timing is good such that i was juz there not too long ago. This movie definitely got me to see 范逸臣differently. Great choice of characters, i lyk it cos they're so wholesome together. Wish i had gotten some 海角七号 stuff from taiwan while i was there. *** argh. When will i come across such a movie again that gets me all enchanted? 海角七号, HUAT! wana get this poster!!! consider getting the OST too. Telling the whole world to go catch the movie b4 它下片. Rj tells me his dad got the dvd from china long ago. OMG.

Have been really off @wrk due to lack of slp & directions. So glad my colleague is back, lest can get sth back on track. But my first rxn was a chill down my spine given the sudden realization with the tight deadlines coming up. yuCKS! Anyways, think will be heading to Seoul next and it clashes right with my driving test date(11th Feb 09). shEESh. Two days ago J asked if i've gotten any sales so far. Then i think "ya hor, i really contributed peanuts (or not even it) since been in the co." haha glad J is back. With him ard there's always things to do and he always sets me thinking. Bz bz year(weeks ahead) that is. Chicken has been off for training on the 7 habits of highly effective ppl in the past week. Great~ She promised to teach me what she learnt. Yes, I NEED IT. Gota admit im quite a nuah sai myself. Always know i nid to change my -ve habits before they creep upon me, into my system, my blood stream. MAchiam lyk my tv disease, i think dirt-sloppy-ness is already under my skin.

What isit about wanting to following my own feelings. R u really listening? Or maybe i've already shut off. It almost feels like a debate. And i always feel lyk the losing end becos perhaps u r right most of the time and i juz choose to chuck everything aside...

Ytd sang ktv @teo heng with Ching,fang,dl and nat from OBS! Totally nv see her for lyk 4yrs. thot she went into IT or sth, haha turns out she's still doing something related. Sang so many songs and its the first time i really found the meanings in the songs relevant. Life is sad with painful moments that juz suck all the happiness from one's already challenged everyday. Ya i know what im gg thru is juz trivial but i juz nid to let it out. ARG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Juz being me

2008-11-17T23:14:00.004+08:00

What makes me, me? Feeling listless that my laptop has been down for a while. Working hours and procrastinating to find out wad exactly consume my laptop is delaying treatment. Its daunting cos my entire uni's photos, doc, wadeva is all inside. Feels like im losing my memories of happy uni life together with my lappie. Dam it.

Its been 2 weeks+ on paper but it alrdy feels lyk a month. Am i not used to it? I begin to understand there's always a trade-off aka "no perfect job". You can get this, dis, tis, these but u muz compensate with dat, that, tat ,thet. OR either that u must really like wad u do. EEE... am i becoming part of the working norm whom gives no shit bout so-called job satisfaction and juz looking forward to hanging out @Balacava on fridays. Ok Bala is kinda atas(not my lvl), i'll most prob be mistaken for some kid (there) anyway. Should go find some live band pubs beta. Ok my point being maybe i dun lyk wad im doing/ im not warming up to it yet. 我总是比较慢热. I think its really more the time issue. I thot i could handle both work and family but uncannily enough both work n family demands every bit of my time. (arGh i really want to spare time for amidala n LYK *this is disturbing besides the growing fear of my tainted laptop) Anyway, I do feel alot for those who really go for wad they want. Congrats to rizal for finally getting that NIE posting! Good for you!

I will go taiwan and see what lies ahead. Afterall travelling is on the list. I hope i dun fall aslp on every moving train/plane etc.

late nites in the EAST & dinner date wit BD lorny

2008-10-27T22:34:00.007+08:00

I realise I cant stop doing wad i lyk. Juz lyk how much i enjoy squatting. Its in my subconscious mind dat i do it. Lyk today is a public holiday but despite i've got kopi duties i still wana hang out late. Wad's with having to work? Everyday also nid to work. Im definitely not alone. Many can relate to this. I simply cant pass up a chance to chill out with frens. Ytd met Mark @ Siglap Gelare. Rather last minute put together but i lyk impromptu. Thot gg Hagen Das but he thot it sud be cheaper at gelare but turns out its not. Haha. Surrounded by some gina pis who's obviously oblivious to the economic downturn, screaming and playing cards and having a good time. My first reaction was "Oh man i really feel lyk playing bridge." I never really thot we'll be talking bout work, life and maybe juz anythin in general. Mark's all excited bout his star tattoo and showing off the photo of his new kha gia @work on his ipone. So we sat dere chit chatting till we got chased off @ 11. Thot we'll continue at the opposite kopitiam but after chking out the last bus timing i reckon we'll juz hang ard some pathway to continue. So I walk and Mark Tong pushes his bike. We ended up at the siglap park connectors, despite the doggy-smelling seats. We sat there and amidst the smoke we went on and on about zh, work, life anything. So late it was 1+ nearly 2 when we got up and left. Headed towards fidelio street. He thot i can ride the bike and he'll go get his blades from home but i doubt i can ride up the slopes. So i reckon i walk and he cycle (SLOWLY). So we went on and on, past frankel avenue, behind the dark alleys, across a park, along the street where my sec sch fren Siqin used to reside and towards East Shore. Alllll the way down Four Seasons, past the temple @ Tembling and voaw la, my home. Time check : 2+. Shit ass i feel bad for making Mark go back so late. Went up bathe n concuss.

24 Oct-Met up with Lorny on friday after work @ heeren Waraku. Went in @7pm & actually left only @ 10pm!! OMG. She dint wana drink (not that i wanted but had intended to go Arena to catch a glimpse of the Class 95 some hot garang babe contest) so simple dinner it was. She wanted to eat there cos she got a $10 discount card but we nid to eat $50 worth. Ey.. So i reckon we sud go slow and take it from there.

Round 1: 6 Assorted sushi wit Soba($14.80), Tempura (VEG) ($8) + unagi egg rice ($10.80) = $33.60

absolutely have space for more. So we tok and chat and got all fussed up bout wad to order next.

Round 2: pizza + lotus chips + green tea ice-cream = Round up total to bt 50 sth. HUAT.

Well the lotus chips were super oily n thin. Can hardly taste the lotus-ness. All in all i told her bt my old and new company, she filled me in on her new co. We tokked and laughed over people we cant remember what's their names from MSE, the economic storm and wad its destroying in its path aka (US), booze and meat days from roof top BBQs (NTU yr 3/yr 4-S1) and basically juz some updates on mse gias. Rush off on MRT to meet yali. After all the hassle manage to get on the same train dat she was on. But with the crowd me n lorny kept aruging bt whether yali is on which side of the door (cos yali is in the centre cabin but we're at the top). Totally cant squeeze thru but i thot we can hop out at the consecutive stations n hop back in to get nearer to the centre. Lorna thinks im crazy but becos the door doesnt open on our side so this plan was disrupted. Sheesh. So bobiah only caught yali when we both drop off @ eunos. Bleh. Sop pick us up & we headed for Siglap cheesecake cafe. A short but nice chit chat in hot tea and a slice of cheesecake we try to shove up each other's face. Still quite a short but huat sit tok exchange. yeah~

"V"

2008-10-12T01:04:00.002+08:00

I'm beginning to lyk driving more. 4th gear is not fast enuff. i wana go even faster. i wana feel the power of the wheels under my feet. 2 hours of driving lessons leave me SUPER DRAINED at the end of it.. ALL DA TIME. Parking next week. YES!

Finaly last minute bought tix to this play cos yuling jio jio me together wit LS. Its sensual, sexy, refreshing, candid, original & heavy all at the same time. SIMPLY LOVE IT! very HUAT! & i muz say 姜还是老的辣. Glad i went afterall. v long nv got to hang out wit the siao gia and LS also. After dat we went to pig out at the kopitiam opposite. LS gave me a ride home. i blasted my walkman pone. It feels exhilarating to hear the wind blowin hard on ur ears wit lounge music in open air. Trying to convince her to get sound system for her bike after this wonderful trial. hehe

p.s: Cant believe we really bump into yali (wit eug n gang) @ bugis. *laughs

A great speech

2008-08-29T01:53:00.008+08:00

The author of The Teenage Textbook (1988) - Adrian Tan, was the guest-of-honour at a recent NTU convocation ceremony. This was his speech to the graduating class of 2008.

Life and How to Survive It

"I must say thank you to the faculty and staff of the Wee Kim Wee School of Communication and Information for inviting me to give your convocation address. It's a wonderful honour and a privilege for me to speak here for ten minutes without fear of contradiction, defamation or retaliation. I say this as a Singaporean and more so as a husband.

My wife is a wonderful person and perfect in every way except one. She is the editor of a magazine. She corrects people for a living. She has honed her expert skills over a quarter of a century, mostly by practising at home during conversations between her and me.On the other hand, I am a litigator. Essentially, I spend my day telling people how wrong they are. I make my living being disagreeable. Nevertheless, there is perfect harmony in our matrimonial home. That is because when an editor and a litigator have an argument, the one who triumphs is always the wife.

And so I want to start by giving one piece of advice to the men: when you've already won her heart, you don't need to win every argument. Marriage is considered one milestone of life. Some of you may already be married. Some of you may never be married. Some of you will be married. Some of you will enjoy the experience so much, you will be married many, many times. Good for you.

The next big milestone in your life is today: your graduation. The end of education. You're done learning.You've probably been told the big lie that 'Learning is a lifelong process' and that therefore you will continue studying and taking masters' degrees and doctorates and professorships and so on. You know the sort of people who tell you that? Teachers. Don't you think there is some measure of conflict of interest? They are in the business of learning, after all. Where would they be without you? They need you to be repeat customers. The good news is that they're wrong.

The bad news is that you don't need further education because your entire life is over. It is gone. That may come as a shock to some of you. You're in your teens or early twenties. People may tell you that you will live to be 70, 80, 90 years old. That is your life expectancy. I love that term: life expectancy. We all understand the term to mean the average life span of a group of people.

But I'm here to talk about a bigger idea, which is what you expect from your life. You may be very happy to know that Singapore is currently ranked as the country with the third highest life expectancy. We are behind Andorra and Japan, and tied with San Marino. It seems quite clear why people in those countries, and ours, live so long. We share one thing in common: our football teams are all hopeless. There's very little danger of any of our citizens having their pulses raised by watching us play in the World Cup. Spectators are more likely to be lulled into a gentle and restful nap.

Singaporeans have a life expectancy of 81.8 years. Singapore men live to an average of 79.21 years, while Singapore women live more than five years longer, probably to take into account the additional time they need to spend in the bathroom.So here you are, in your twenties, thinking that you'll have another 40 years to go. Four decades in which to live long and prosper. Bad news. Read the papers. There are people dropping dead when they're 50, 40, 30 years old. Or quite possibly just after finishing their convocation. They would be very disappointed that they didn't meet their life expectancy.

I'm here to tell you this. Forget about your life expectancy.

After all, it's calculated based on an average. And you never, ever want to expect being average. Revisit those expectations. You might be looking forward to working, falling in love, marrying, raising a family. You are told that, as graduates, you should expect to find a job paying so much, where your hours are so much, where your responsibilities are so much.That is what is expected of you. And if you live up to it, it will be an awful waste. If you expect that, you will be limiting yourself. You will be living your life according to boundaries set by average people. I have nothing against average people. But no one should aspire to be them. And you don't need years of education by the best minds in Singapore to prepare you to be average.

What you should prepare for is mess. Life's a mess.

You are not entitled to expect anything from it. Life is not fair. Everything does not balance out in the end. Life happens, and you have no control over it. Good and bad things happen to you day by day, hour by hour, moment by moment. Your degree is a poor armour against fate. Don't expect anything. Erase all life expectancies. Just live. Your life is over as of today. At this point in time, you have grown as tall as you will ever be, you are physically the fittest you will ever be in your entire life and you are probably looking the best that you will ever look. This is as good as it gets. It is all downhill from here. Or up. No one knows. What does this mean for you? It is good that your life is over. Since your life is over, you are free. Let me tell you the many wonderful things that you can do when you are free.

The most important is this: do not work.

Work is anything that you are compelled to do. By its very nature, it is undesirable.Work kills. The Japanese have a term 'Karoshi', which means death from overwork. That's the most dramatic form of how work can kill. But it can also kill you in more subtle ways. If you work, then day by day, bit by bit, your soul is chipped away, disintegrating until there's nothing left. A rock has been ground into sand and dust.There's a common misconception that work is necessary. You will meet people working at miserable jobs. They tell you they are 'making a living'. No, they're not. They're dying, frittering away their fast-extinguishing lives doing things which are, at best, meaningless and, at worst, harmful.

People will tell you that work ennobles you, that work lends you a certain dignity. Work makes you free. The slogan 'Arbeit macht frei' was placed at the entrances to a number of Nazi concentration camps. Utter nonsense. Do not waste the vast majority of your life doing something you hate so that you can spend the small remainder sliver of your life in modest comfort. You may never reach that end anyway. Resist the temptation to get a job. Instead, play. Find something you enjoy doing. Do it. Over and over again. You will become good at it for two reasons: you like it, and you do it often. Soon, that will have value in itself.I like arguing, and I love language. So, I became a litigator. I enjoy it and I would do it for free. If I didn't do that, I would've been in some other type of work that still involved writing fiction - probably a sports journalist.

So what should you do? You will find your own niche. I don't imagine you will need to look very hard. By this time in your life, you will have a very good idea of what you will want to do. In fact, I'll go further and say the ideal situation would be that you will not be able to stop yourself pursuing your passions. By this time you should know what your obsessions are. If you enjoy showing off your knowledge and feeling superior, you might become a teacher. Find that pursuit that will energise you, consume you, become an obsession. Each day, you must rise with a restless enthusiasm. If you don't, you are working.

Most of you will end up in activities which involve communication. To those of you I have a second message: be wary of the truth. I'm not asking you to speak it, or write it, for there are times when it is dangerous or impossible to do those things. The truth has a great capacity to offend and injure, and you will find that the closer you are to someone, the more care you must take to disguise or even conceal the truth. Often, there is great virtue in being evasive, or equivocating. There is also great skill. Any child can blurt out the truth, without thought to the consequences. It takes great maturity to appreciate the value of silence.

In order to be wary of the truth, you must first know it. That requires great frankness to yourself. Never fool the person in the mirror.

I have told you that your life is over, that you should not work, and that you should avoid telling the truth. I now say this to you: be hated.It's not as easy as it sounds. Do you know anyone who hates you? Yet every great figure who has contributed to the human race has been hated, not just by one person, but often by a great many. That hatred is so strong it has caused those great figures to be shunned, abused, murdered and in one famous instance, nailed to a cross.One does not have to be evil to be hated. In fact, it's often the case that one is hated precisely because one is trying to do right by one's own convictions. It is far too easy to be liked, one merely has to be accommodating and hold no strong convictions. Then one will gravitate towards the centre and settle into the average. That cannot be your role. There are a great many bad people in the world, and if you are not offending them, you must be bad yourself. Popularity is a sure sign that you are doing something wrong.

The other side of the coin is this: fall in love.

I didn't say 'be loved'. That requires too much compromise. If one changes one's looks, personality and values, one can be loved by anyone.Rather, I exhort you to love another human being. It may seem odd for me to tell you this. You may expect it to happen naturally, without deliberation. That is false. Modern society is anti-love. We've taken a microscope to everyone to bring out their flaws and shortcomings. It far easier to find a reason not to love someone, than otherwise. Rejection requires only one reason. Love requires complete acceptance. It is hard work - the only kind of work that I find palatable.

Loving someone has great benefits. There is admiration, learning, attraction and something which, for the want of a better word, we call happiness. In loving someone, we become inspired to better ourselves in every way. We learn the truth worthlessness of material things. We celebrate being human. Loving is good for the soul.

Loving someone is therefore very important, and it is also important to choose the right person. Despite popular culture, love doesn't happen by chance, at first sight, across a crowded dance floor. It grows slowly, sinking roots first before branching and blossoming. It is not a silly weed, but a mighty tree that weathers every storm.You will find, that when you have someone to love, that the face is less important than the brain, and the body is less important than the heart. You will also find that it is no great tragedy if your love is not reciprocated. You are not doing it to be loved back. Its value is to inspire you. Finally, you will find that there is no half-measure when it comes to loving someone. You either don't, or you do with every cell in your body, completely and utterly, without reservation or apology. It consumes you, and you are reborn, all the better for it.

Don't work. Avoid telling the truth. Be hated. Love someone.

You're going to have a busy life. Thank goodness there's no life expectancy. "

A bowl a bowl...

2008-08-02T01:34:00.028+08:00

OMG so much has happened since July 19. FOOT, Sz's convo, my convo, sentosa... yada yada. FOOT '08 first bah. Its totally amazing cos i dint expect to go back foot again this yr..let's see, my 4th foot camp. i wasnt a footie so the first time i went was as an SA, den programmer, den GL n this yr back to being an SA again. I cudnt decide whether to go cos dun wana be diao er lang dang for too long. But after the freshies' briefing i totally GOTA come back again (esp since im still unemployed); never seen this many seniors return for camp b4. So heartening to see all the old Ofoes kids come back as SAs this yr, and to see all my old frens, kerui, mickey mouse, renjian, weisi etc.

D1: As usual, day 1 is lyk taking turtle speed to warm up. Totally cant remember cheers, games or wadsoeva UNTIL we join em back at the sch's oritentation. Went mad with the pinky "Octans grand welcome" & BOWL cheer. i think i got it den. All the craziness was activated once we reach Zhang Mei's station. Made KS taunt ZM wit his pinky. Not bad for his first try. Earlier on stupid chong meng even asked me where's my notebook cos last yr i took notes of games+cheers cos my memory bank canot contain. Was trying 2 spread e pinky culture when tanya exclaimed "So unglam!!" *Heart breaks.. den peifen taunt me again. Dam dat bitch!!!

*me, weisi, kang, princess gazing afar

D2: ARGH!! stupid RJ literally threw me out of my own sleeping bag. i only slept for 2 hrs!!! thot wasnt gg to Dragonboat deeeeeeeeeeee. End up i dint wana row but was taunt to do it cos kang & hazel keep on niam niam niam say i come down den gg to zhuo boh. I cant stand being TAUNT!! SO i immediately changed into day 1's stinky gear n hop into the boat. WE bloody won cos our boat was full!! Strong 22 men team. muahahaaa. Quite Tai Go la but hey we won over a free SP: Chengzhi from Dara!!!! After dat had to leave for endau as the advanced team. oh bye bye octans boys and gers. Bus ride to campside was smoooooth. Every1 KO in the bus. I only managed to tok less den 15 mins to peifen b4 we both silently decided to snooze. Was discussing bt the freshies earlier on. hehehe...

*Duno whether u can actually see winston's bulging arms!!

D3: Finally after a good nites' rest we had the chance to go sit on the rocks n enjoy the stream. Jer bought his guitar has was already playing his song attracted him fans - dennis, weisi, jito to sing along side wit his tunes. The rest of us seniors got in n slowly got high with gaming. BECOS its actually prohibited to go into the water, the moment the freshies arrived we had to BREAK UP n rush up to "shore". The bowl was brewing den... Next, lunch den animal game den Gladiator? I thot the game rocks! Felt alot lyk dota... "TACTIC BOMB!". The moment it was freeAfter the game i decided to go down n wash my slippers. The next thing i knew kang n weisi is behind n they juz swing me into the water. FUG!! Den Weisi went down to wash shorts. Hey turns out the rule was loosen and we can ALL go into the water again. SO HORRAY!! EVERY1 DOWN NOW NOW NOW~! But its really omg cos Octans is HUGE!!! The seniors totally outnumbered the kids! cos we have extra seniors to fight against the freshies under the "how many ppl standing up, strip strip strip" game challenge @ endau base camp riverside. The night time cooking compeition was a mad rush!! As usual i was appointed the FEEDER. Ya i think i lyk this feeling of shared food. Everybody eating from the same spoon. Josh was too stressed to eat. The storyline was hilarious. Tat nite peifen, me, gwen, hazel, ching stayed behind for some gers tok. nice~ when to get such chances again, out in the open, all on field chairs?

D4: Today we trek up! brrrrr.......... it was dam cold. Take photo also guys n gers one side each! omg!! haha but gota tok more n see more happenings going on between the freshies emselves. When we came down, as usual i kena ambushed by gan & weisi together. Kang boy why u dint rescue me n left me to their clutches!!! AARGGHH!!!!! hahaha.. HTHT after campfire was a major obstacle cos remembering last yr the total no. of ppl in the circle was only bt...15 max? this yr is lyk nearly twice the size. Im totally taken aback by the energy that the Octans freshies put in. It was DA bomb man to watch em do their cheer fight. TOTALLY high. I think they did a FANTASTIC job to bring together tat 8-9 minutes of non stop lineup in such short notice and that they brought it out as ONE. I always thot it was a pity to see a segregation betwn the boys n the gers thru-out the camp. More cud be done i guess. Haha after bringing daniel n fiona over to castor to get SP when we came back we were bitching n bitching!! A bowl a bowl.. OMg even the most mellow boy Kang was lyk change it the a **** cheer!! *roar of laughter broke out.. I turn around and see the boys playing cards. The girls quietly doing their own chit chatting. Jeremy strums away..

D5: Dam i woke up last. Again. Due to some changes, i was transferred from advanced team to main party. OH i thot its good. Can get more chances to interact wit the freshies. While camping at the kopitiam, we played asshole dai di. After the freshies arrived and ate, i kop rj's RM n bought the freshies some icecream. Muahaha i was totally out of RM den. Thanks Mr Regina Gan!! Thot the freshies was getting along pretty well den. When they were posing for group photos. Thot might as well make em redo their cheer fight dere den they can get to keep the vid too! Personally i juz wanted to see it again cos they look absolutely endearing doing it. Argh!! after that some ppl went to play cards but the rest were practising Wah Ga Li Ya cheer..All squeezed up on a van!!!!! Can see how much they enjoyed doing this.

*one for all, all for one!

*SAs do our own flying stint *Pose n SMILE~

Finally taking bus back to johor!! GAMES TIME ON DA BUS!! Hsien taught em the starfish & bah kwa cheer. Hilarious. The right behind the bus team played "Huat 99, Drinking game, Chi Dong Qiang". Players includes... *mickey mouse, kang, hazel, me, michelle, josh,KS, moo,kj, daniel, winston. Dinner @ johor was settled at a duck shop, something more authentic. Very sorry Diyana!! My mistake. From sheng shiong while waiting for the ride back to sch, new violent slapping games was introduced. On the bus, it was the higher challenge, "Qing Ni Geng Wo Zhe Yang Zhuo" in 8 beats b4 we all merge to play "Ji Niu Nai" and it was a CRAZY ROWDY CROWD!!!! EVERY1 has gone seriously Kuku den. SAVE ME! Den it was Odac Talk. The FF operation we schemed to carry out was practised in vain. Its lyk we're dam losers getting high on our own doing it. CRAPPY!! Celebrated little tanya's burfday back @ the grandstand. Was quite beat den already. Supper was shity. Tat nite i fell aslp on the track in the midst of toking to kang n hazelnut but i was mostly blabbering nonsense, COLD!!!

D6: Slept for another 2hrs only. NOOO!!!!! Canoe polo zai!! Think every1 enjoyed emselves.

*Happy octans. omg did u see KS's pose?!?!!
Played the slapping game with quek, CAT, kang, shiqi, Peifen. Became common enemy with quek n cat. Muz be becos of my GL vibe too strong. Dam the two anyway! Kena whack lyk siao. Later on we switch to the slapping leg game. Despite being showed mercy, i acted GL to kang & slap him dam hard. Aiyah not hard not fun mah!!! ya but in the end my hands got burst veins from WS n QUEK's MASSIVE ATTACKS earlier on. Anyway, too bad FF not in 2day, so i dint wana let our practises goes to waste. I thot we cud translate our anger to video so dat it'll be lyk Ju-On & gets PASSED IT ON>>> haha mostly i juz wanted to see how we look lyk on camera. Cos i thot it was gg to be furni. Oh yeah indeed. But well, wad happens @ camp stays dere. Unless there's a good reason for another round. Later. The freshies den secretly went ahead to plan their skit. At hall 8, saw the most digusting sight. Chengzhi n jovin!!! omg.. hahaha the seniors immediately gathered for more camwhore moments. Finally yali n gang arrived. Tiring day. I thot Octans seriously adored the V bomb cheer due to the ending (o-o-O-O-Octans!). Mickey mouse the orginator is proud that his orgasmic cheer has seen light. So tired i fell aslp under ching's funky cap until it was announced we're the FAMILY FAMILY OG. "Best title to grab", i thot. Hope we did made the freshies feel dat way too. After that did WAH GA LI YA & odac spirit. Bide farewell to the freshies. Princess Awed me yet again with her little letters to the entire freshies n seniors alike: more den 25 in all! Ni you xing le. Supper!!!! den it was back to serious business. Yawnz. KO-ed @ 4+am after i thot my job was done.

*Octans seniors feeling sleeepyy

*Octans'08(sloppy pyjamas)

*Ofoes'07 (BOLLYWOOD)

D7: woke up at 9+am cos was being "LaP-ed" in my sleeping bag again! and dat the sun was shining over me. Another morning on the grandstand. Breakfast @canteen 2 wit Yali, rj, ws, jer,chongmeng, hazel, ching, serene.

End camp thots

OFOES: Im surprised that ppl lyk Calvin quek is lyk zai gia at boh liao games but totally a NEWB @ cheers. Even at the end of camp he's lyk clueless bt the bowl cheer. But he's too cock n furni so he's forgiven and thus downgraded to become "da shit". Peifen totally got the chao ah lian seh (OMFG). She revealed all in the camp this yr. Totally upz. She openly taunt me on D1 with the RARR pinky finger. Hazelnut is mingling around the young ones n working her magic. She looks absolutely FIERCE in the pinky finger pose. Kang also another one, totally all e Guai Lan seh all exposed this yr!! Wad's happening to our hao hao xian shenG?! omg why my freshies all turn out so fine!!! im so proud. I sincerely hoped i played a part in bringing out the devil in them. (**Smiling lyk a mom who's proud of her kids). Now u know how i felt last yr gwenny kena daopok! i think the freshies really love the ur starfish, hsien. Most importantly: To be able to do a camp a 2nd time with you guys is simply priceless to me. Thank you all.

SENIORS: Happy to see so many familar faces including Tam Chong Meng back this yr. Princess, Ching, mickey mouse, weisi, gan.. This yr tung boy finally cried. Last yr he said he cudnt understand so i guess he got it this yr. Dear ruyan, dun be so sad, it may not be ur last camp yet. Glad to see other old birds lyk cheekeong, mark tong, shuhong, shun zhang @ overseas too :)) Special thanks to benji & shiqi for helping to bond the group and it was nice knowing you Chia Zabor!! Next yr i will really be the kind who can only come back on SP nite le..

FRESHIES: I saw dat special sth when u guys did ur cheer fight. And despite saying all the girls n boys dun get along so well thing, i believe some of u did get to know some others beta. We can only spark off wad seem lyk something dat may last for very long. But lyk budding roots, it takes effort to kip it growing strong. Last but not least, im very proud to be an Octans SA and also happy to get the chance to know all of u! :)

2008-07-13T00:50:00.006+08:00

Saw lyk an array of stars thru my kitchen grill juz now. cos kitchen wasnt lit up so its lyk dark. There were lyk 8/9 of em, i thot for a moment they are planes cos got flickers of red occasionally. but cannot be wad!! Which concludes: Yup they must be STARS. Haha.. its amazing how such a sight teleports me right back to the distant memory when i was @ Belumut(2004) sept recess break? or was it october. nah, whenever dat was, it was my 1st trek in m'sia. Totally awesome. The sky view @ the top was really machiam u open up an astronomy book with an overview of the entire stars system. Fugging chio. it was also really cold dou. But cos the campsite was so small, all the male n female participants had to squeeze into one tent each. The trip ICs (XB,mark,hf) still so yaya papaya slp until so shuang cos they bought their own tent to slp in!! And cos there were lyk 7 gers!! it was mission impossible to slp. The moment one of the gers turn sideway u see the rest squeezing in therefore making it super hard to lie flat on ur backs again. Ching rong was so squashed up she protested by shaking violently for 2 seconds(imagine how a kid throws tantrum). This was how sardined-packed we were. Not to mention, all the body heat and fighting for oxygen was making it all the more challenging. Plus, I cud see thru wad's outside the tent from the door and windows cos we left em unzipped to assist in beta air flow. That was a semi-sleepless nite. I dint dare to let my eyes wander for that primitive fear of seeing a white/black/slender figure at any corner outside the tent. (Best, as im typing now im getting goosebumps as i recall back). But the whole combination of stuff juz made it very hilarious. Anyway, even for now, forest/nature still woahs me (i gota say i have absolute R.E.S.P.E.C.T when im in their territory man. Don't play play). Another 2 more days and i'll be throwing myself into the arms of Da Zhi Ran again cos FOOT '08 is here to stay. oh~~ im gg to miss my bed. >,< I think this is the main reason why i dun dare to slp outside the tents despite i did try during the FOOT'06 overseas seniors camp. It was with joo,rene,me,marc. I cudnt slp again cos im so exposed in the open + im dam scared to wake up a frozen ice bar or sth. They all fell asleep and I WAS STILL AWAKE!! its pitch black. I heard sounds (turns out one of the tent got ppl listening to a repeated song played on hp). I tried to make myself snooze. I CUDNT. I had to slowly crawl up (so dat i dun disturb the other 3) and crept back into the tent. haha good attempt but its not gg to happen again!!! (dam why are there shows lyk blair witch project) Anyhow, dat was the official first time i came to tok to shunzhang and realise the biTCH in him. Totally camwhore already then, super talkative and BHB. Im lyk, "HUH?!!?!". He's this kinda person?! One whole yr black face me. But i dint loogi. I also chao bin him back the entire yr b4 we created the term "friendquaintant" together, right @ Panti basecamp on seniors camp nite.

ECP blading,big gulp & ktv

2008-07-04T01:40:00.009+08:00

Ytd went to book advanced theory test @ubi with hoops. Took me long enough siah. Heng she's eager to get her license therefore, me( a major nuah sai) can ride on her energy and ethusiasm to get started finally!!! (despite i worry bout wad kinda destruction i may cause to road users). After that went city plaza for some honest shopping den ended off in beach road eating Char Kway Teow+Claypot rice. Did abit of small tok with LS & got her raving bout why ppl are making comments that "she can be difficult to manage" (oh...truth hurts). In the end got miself a felix cat tee+ a pair of berms for dad from army market. Walked over to golden mile cos Hoops cudnt get her grey/neon green wordings (the pair that i haf) fbt shorts so she wanted to try her luck at the sports shop over dere. Woah really lyk mini thailand in that place. Pretty exciting too bad dint have much we cud get there. At nite, after sending Liang and chicken off, rj called me. Emo he is, again. Tokked bt gr,his bgr,odac,frens and other stuff in general in that 38 mins. Ended off with the resolution to go ecp blade the next day which is 2day la.

Tried to jio ppl(everything was more or less last minute put together). Went to meet rj at parkway 1st cos looks lyk gg to rain(got tok to liang on the pone). Rj commented that my tone is different as compared to tokking to odac ppl(Ah beh den rite~). Ya anyway the sun rose back!! In the end we still ended up in easy breezy ECP & met up with jer & ws at Macs. If not becos jeremy is coming & for the free tanning session, CAT wud even budge. Left eye was irritated by contacts so i kept sniffing becos of it (they kept telling me to stop crying). THEN, lyk some ethu newbs, me, jer n rj headed for the 2hrs $7 blades rental place. We happily put on our blades & the uncle, sensing our chui-ness offered us assorted guards b4 we move off. Lazy CAT(aka weisi), obviously not knowin how to blade, volunteered as the maid of the day & help take our big bag small bag. While the other us 3 clumsily head off for an uncertain adventure, CAT headed str8 for the beach. Quite furni the 3 of us going at different speeds and occasionally see rj fall flat in front, but is the slow mo kind. JEr on my side kept doing the swinging-backwards-threatening-to-fall-back stunt. HAHA looks lyk the previous 4hrs of intensive blading with jeff & zg paid off. This time round not so bad for me, & i enjoyed the feel on blades. But i still suck in the turning. MUST practise more. We only blade to the end of ecp (towards BIG SPLASH direction & back to the rental place). In between we went carl's junior dere grab a big gulp from 7-11, and also did some turning practices on the smooth grounds available. B4 that it was furni watching RJ try to conquer the little upslope. As jer n me both not zai enuff to assist, we only watch(& cheer) in a distance. MUAHAHAa... we say go again next week. Hope all the backaches this time round will spur em to blade> 2hrs next time!

At nite went to katong shopping centre to makan & ktv(heng its thurs nite so no nid to book)! Finding parking lot in the quiet private houses was a lucky shot cos manage to get a place in the end. They kept laughin at my pri sch's name (HAIG girls'=/= HATE girls can~). They laugh even louder knowing there's a HB. simi dabian -_-". During dinner, stupid rj insisted on getting a whole chicken for ONLY the 4 of us. OR sud i say they all insisted ( i was boycotted), ask em drink wad also dun wana answer me. REALLY is ^*&(#@%^*. hahaha in the end dinner cost $7 for chickie rice each + $1.2 for drink(why must eat so ex de rice?!! CAT gave me the "i know how u feel look") Supper got alot of cucumber & dao gua also duno for waD. Muahaha rj kept complaining bout his drink $1.2 is syrup water. SERVES HIM RIGHT. Den got dabao dessert in and we sang the whole 2hours (8-10pm). Jer is lyk a singing pro can~ any kinda song he also can "biao". Pei FU pei Fu. Den u see happy rj and ws sang "Shao Nian You" by Ukelele. Tried attempting "Ai de zhu xuan lue" with ws but duno why the song is lyk dam low key. it sounded more lyk two men singing in the end. Den b4 the 3 last phrase JEr den realise its cos he fergot to return the key to normal from previous song. BEST. hahaa after that PIA home for bitchy ANTM but i miss the 1st 10mins which is the juicy part i wanted to watch. SOBZ. Stupid CAT kept saying im the EMO one today but its suppose to be RJ can~~~ YAYAYA!! I think today's exercise has released enuff endorphins to kip our jian boy happy for awhile. Till den.

overdue entry

2008-06-27T13:15:00.009+08:00

Its been lyk econs since finally out of school. ytd went for "YOUUUobi" 3rd round interview and all i get after is thots. not really wanting to start in july due to studio pic, convo, foot and maybe juz not prepared+ROOM requires MAJOR CLEANUP. its gg to be a mad rush once work starts. oh boy, not prepared i m (copying Yoda's style of speech). quite sad when gary told me he dint get the stint, feeling abit DL bt the way his interview was held. Gary's got the package but that guy dint see it rite~~ Anyway, constantly wondering bout wad future beholds and bloody hell my stuff is still 1/2 stuck in hall. finally going to clear em all n laggy bring everything back home. nid to pack proper so i can really "fang xia xing lai" and move on. Although i dont lyk the fact that many a times im still concerned bout wad goes on in odac but i guess it cant be helped. i really wana see em do well so i still wana go back for the ppl. Definitely not doing as much as joo. now is a transition to me. so much stuff still unsettled. dun lyk the feeling. Lest for NOW, wad i wana achieve is spend more time home and make some +ve changes here and there. Spend more time with chicken cos she misses having me around and i missed her too from all the nights spent in hall alone, help mom to pick up a healthier regime, make dad alittle happier, tidy up my house and definitely mY room. Spend more quality time with ah liang too.

At local seniors' camp, as i did the night cycling with my group led by ck & zhang mei, it really feels &&%$#@ nostalgic. my group also got peifen, kang boy, princess, gwenny, zm's sister, mickey mouse weiqin. Remembering all the nites me,rene,yali,eug neh neh, kk, ky had to go thru to finalise the foot 06 route. omg. Looking @ zhang mei led the group reminded me of how i led "Osux" in 06. i was still quite a newb lo.. basically im not zai on the road and my stamina was CHUI. Lest this time round the actual and post cycling was not that BAD on the whole. Princess kerui nv fails to bond ppl together. this flair of hers not many possess and im a fan. Once away blown off by her poweress.

Despite i couldnt go for overseas seniors' camp, in a way i was torn cos i wanted v much to go but i fergot it falls in the weekend of chicken's (sis) burfday-14th June. she told me on monday den i was !!!! Shit arse. already confirmed my tix on sunday rite after night cycling but come to think of it i haven really gota celebrate her burfday for the past 4 yrs. She wanted to do a simple BBQ upstairs so i thot, ya, there sud be a balance. And im totally glad we did it. Dou the food is not fantastic, she ended up being the griller the whole nite, but i thot my SARA LEE strawberry cheesecake ended the nite with a BANG. A nice simple time for us all to get together and also utilise the rooftop. Muahhaha.. me & Liang gege went to get the groceries from katong mall's Cold Storage dat evening but b4 that went to zhenhe's hse play mj. won lyk 20? lately got the streak... dunoe why!

2008-06-04T03:31:00.008+08:00

Faith is something so funny. Faith in people is always something good to hav but it really needs to be earned. And some people really do not deserve my respect. How naive it is of one to judge. And how baseless accusation hurts. NO one dictates how i behave cept myself. Reminds me again on how much i hate dealing with humans sometimes cos its juz so tiring. Zig and polly pocket are much simpler can. Dat's why i like to have DOGS as pets.

OMFG

2008-06-02T14:17:00.026+08:00

wah lao body is aching lyk there's no tomorrow. WAD is this?! haha this morning i woke up feeling lyk a dead fish, body+head+tummy aches all in one. ytd nite's clearing up of Pumpfest'08 is really chop chop curry pok. But the Fun Climb the day b4 add up to ytd's heavy loading made my bones shatter!!! DEEP HEAT TO MY RESCUE. Been a loooooong while since i last sat @ the back of the lorry. feels juz lyk year 1 when i was froze to death on the ride back to sch after pumpfest'05. This few days kip kena recall back to redhill for kopi-soh duties so only went to kallang leisure park in the late noon. 1st time go for PF muz bring sweater wan. Super cold when usually this event calls for sunblock/a good tanning session ("lobster look" as quoted by some1). Heng manage to cut & dye hair cos been too sianz with my unkempt look for tooooo long.

Realise its lyk nearly a month since end exams. So much has taken place. I got the chance to go back home to enjoy the good old company of zig,polly & chicken. Queen amidala & LYK seems pleased to have me around BUT BUT BUT everytime i go back home later den 11 or slp @ 2am will kena questioning lyk some deliquent/runaway rebellious gia. Simi sai. >< Da bomb came when pa says"Sch has ended for u already", handing me (only) 4 blue notes....TOTALLY cutting down my allowance by 60%!!! OMFG. i figured if i dun eat too much, dun shop at all, avoid drinking @ public areas, no max expenditure more than $25 for ANY outing: It can work out. MUAHAHA. But least i juz went to the photo booth to get my pics taken juz now (made the important move). YUCKS! fugly. Anyhow, tmr muz go charm/smoke/taunt my interviewers. Today cant do it man. Body really too painful and also mentally & documentarily unprepared!!!

My sch's grad nite on 6th May held @Quality Hotel was super low key can~~ Went so that can see all the slackers in my school & grab some pics b4 we all venture out till i dunoe when will meet again. Not too bad cos my table was all my frens cept for the two poor souls who were out nowhere. Here's some pics from the nite.

ok la i must say i really enjoyed life w/o the school work but im really missing my frens, swimming sessions, drinking sessions, mj, tok cork, late nites ALREADY. OMG. Haha ching!!! Kelson is back from Viet & chui-ing me bout the mj session together with jason!!! help me out!!! When should we gather & where~~~

Weee~~~

2008-04-17T13:06:00.012+08:00

Finaly its 1 paper down!! the wait was so long... muahhahaa.. after i come back hall i juz feel lyk chionging as class 95 music fills my room. ok 3 more papers to go!! tmr meeting lion king(pHD) for some Q&A. can feel the momentum liao! mugging @ hall 13 study room with hoops for past 2 days had been fruitful. got some 心情to do laundry & change bedsheet(cos kena complain by hoops say why so long its still the same -_-"). Sunday when i ate "Te Tou Teng" with my mom @ hawker centre i briefly mention to her "what will u do if i become a hawker next time?" Wah seh then her face become blacker den the sky!! Well, i guess she had been thru' it so she knows its alot of hard work & long hours; even now @ kopitiam its the same mah. Hmm~~ okok how bt i open a cafe? Been thinking bt it but think nid to go those italian restaurant or wad be cheap labor for 1/2 yr to gain some experience. boo.. & got no capital dat's y wana start out @ hawker centre 1st wad~~~rather den having to fear if i messed sth up or cause some scary explosion at work. But think nid to earn some bucks for the 1st 2yrs after i grad?? Hopefully 2 yrs is enuff la but where can i get jobs that pay 3k+++ lyk sz!!!! Argggh!! Career Fair 2008 this 26,27 April here i come !!! Who wana go with me? Totally chui~~ Anyway, saw madonna's new album cover in 8 days. i must totally go get the album. HOT HOT HOT.
After da Wasabi Tei session @ Far East last thurs(100408) with yaleech, i have been craving for the salmon "sashimmmmi" and yaya her "chawaaaaan". muahahaha.. been thinking bout trying out the other raw delicacies lyk yellowtail? tuna is abit er. Past few days was crazy lor, juz lyk kip seeing raw fish slices swimming in my head :} Definitely gg back again and next time going 2 jio Ching & Shan along. yum yum. Hoops juz told me tix for viet has rised to lyk 300+ due to stupid oil price inflation. NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! When will my big break come?

This song is for you know who :D thankz for all your support and love and care all these while baby~~ >.< When can we go catch a movie, sushi, jalan jalan? when when when!!!

@_@

2008-04-08T23:10:00.002+08:00

ArgHHH!! its times lyk this when i feel im better off not studying. Mugging for exams is such a drag. Feel lyk i've wasted lyk 5 hrs of my life doing online lect today.. Chui!!! Not gg lwn le!! Must hop study places. Suddenly miss last yr when Mark always come n accompany me to mug. Den will tok cork n discuss bt stuff. Nowadaes lyk every1 is not around. Lonely lonely* Jio Mark for dinner this week in town, he seems down with work woes. Time to get out of sch. Anyway, maybe i will enjoy working since i can get to meet up with ching & gang soon. And everyday can see zig n polly. Ppl lyk rj n yuling enjoys working as well. I only remember enjoy 泡 Kopi. i dun remember enjoying my IA work but i had alot of fun with my colleages n NTU slackers. Mark is right i guess.. "you must know what you when to do when u find your job, so u dun waste time". Ya i see such cases around.. But lyk him, i noe wad i dun want but i duno wad i want. Or maybe wad i want i canot get. And dam! HsiEn juz loves "polly"-pocket. Check out his msn pic.

Ya why do u not believe me when i say i mean it? You r the ultimate 冬瓜豆腐. i hate you!!!!!

Another afternoon in (BORING) lwn

2008-04-08T14:59:00.003+08:00

ya.. its yet another day in lwn. somehow its juz difficult to study in hall. whole day also lyk no traffic ard. sort of missing normal school days already. Ytd after malay decided to go chiong online @ lwn but almost die-ed cos machiam i was in foreign land. Today juz canot get enuff ppl to form a table. maybe i'll try again tmr. since joo today nid to go interview. Oh why joo oh why r u so moody? even gary toks weird. Graduate only mah, another phase of life dou uncertain things may be, but u nv know wad beholds u in the working world. >< Ya i hope to start work in july.. feel lyk gg Viet. HOW HOW?

(*blogging interrupted by smurfie chow chow as he contemplates 'bout me having 7 distractions: 1) blogspot 2) msn conversations x2 4) spider solitare 5) BOOST calbury choc 6) 8 Days Magazine 7) HP and only 3 study factors a)online lect b) notes c) tut 2.. boohoo)

Ya decided to take a bite on the lazat(tasty in melayu) looking Boost choc & its YUM YUM YUM. MUST TRY. "Smooth textured choc flavoured centred with crunchy biskit bites wrapped in caramel, all covered in calbury milk chocolate". 7-11 now only selling @ 2 for 2.50!! super hua! i know tung boy n gary sure will lyk @_@ Online lect is getting boring... ytd i created a Facebook acct while waiting for stupid zh (who says wana come my room to play game but dint turn up in the end) so i juz nuah & nuah cos was expecting him to break my nuah sai momentum. Oh boy... now is back to the "i muz force myself to do work" mode again.

Balloon girl

2008-04-03T19:19:00.002+08:00

Dat's wad alwin said on msn when i told him bt my body incapable of digesting milk. Cos last week kept having koko crunch with milk for breakfast but doc says my body got no milk enzyme since im not a regular milk maid. no~~~ all the happy moments i shared with my cereal~ juz feeling very uncomfortably bloated in the tummy this week. ok ran on monday nite for 1/2 hr (as quoted from the latest Chronicles: 中医建议, do more exercise can 加强肺脏 gong neng but i think again lyk got nuthin to do with intenstines rite), ya anyway, suddenly ntu seems so lonely. nobody's on the road. But still not that bad with music in my ears. Ytd ran again but this time round with weisi, ya once again the roads are empty & all im thinking in my mind is "i canot stop! i muz at least catch up with him". i noe he is running real slow cos his legs so much longer he cud haf gone lyk the wind with his large strides. We end off @ the hall 12 fitness corner. Incapable of anymore situps due to overexertion on monday, i attempted to do leg raise. ok not very zai. mayb will try again on friday. oh gary gary where r u? was wondering which are the alternate days u run. Don't dare to ask joo to run cos im so SLOW!!! dam it~ Finished FMA anime on monday. Quite sad lehz. i dun realy lyk the ending, reminds me alot of Dark Materials. So good stories end this way huh? rite... will attempt the movie next.

So fast, its already April. & none of us (Leech, joo) has gotten the time/ mood to go plan for grad trip. I MUST do sth bt it!! Still thinking bt chionging next wed. Never got to step into zouk again since start of march. when when when is the next time i'll be dere~~ *wonder wonder. As i listen to late nite class 95, it almost feels lyk the real deal. (humming: i sud be so lucky lucky lucky lucky). Malay CA 2 was a breeze. if only the exam can be as predictable. NOOO~~~ !!~~ i dun even wana think about the countless on-line i muz pia for next week. BORING~ so looking forward to pumpfest cos its so near my house. haven beeen to the new leisure park. i use to hang out dere in primary sch. Met up with KY in sch ytd and he said most prob i will end up jobless for 2 months becos he was jobless for 3. Kopi soh during no allowance period den? i thot that cud be an option. Or mayb i juz take over the empty stall @ kopitiam n sell that weird ice shavings sold in can 2 now. muahahhaa.. not that bad huh. im so hungry.. duno why bloatedness makes me hungry all the time. ShEEsh.

2008-03-19T20:55:00.000+08:00

so tired... i must pull through. many trips to go after exams... ><

Troubled times

2008-03-18T00:14:00.009+08:00

Its been lyk how many hell weeks. 1 wave after another. Dunnoe leh hand up 1st draft le kinda feel abit lost. isit cos its time to move on? I've been wanting to blog but i juz stop myself, if got time i will watch FMA or Xiu Cai Yu Jian Bing. Dun really wana think or see wad's really happening i guess. Cos many times when i stop, i find myself unable to hold it together. Machiam lyk "1 litre of tears". I always find it quite amazing how come gary can always illustrate his "sobbing episodes" on his blog cos even dou i do cry alot but i will paiseh de. Most of the times i'll rather not tok bt it. Ok gary i think u can be the "New Age Man". Ya... Cudnt believe the no. of times my spirits hit pit bottom in the last 2 weeks. But i sincerely thank sz, gary, ws,tung who kip trying to jio me for makan and to kip me company (swimming was good until when i canot go) , almost see some of u lyk on daily basis during recess break. You guys really dunoe how much that helped. That day when u(YES U) and ws dropped by my hall after your run with i think one can of coke light and 100% and we went rooftop rem? i was actually tearing lyk some shit but suddenly say downstairs my hall le den i muz use super fast speed to dry up loh. -_-" ARGHH!!! so chui!! Den everyday make every1 worry(mark, hoops,ah liang,yali, etc etc).. ><

*
Quite upset in a way cos the day b4 my burfday when yali jio for dinner i thot it's juz eat dinner den go. Dint think there were gg to be anything or wad. But! there's grace, tung, weisi, gary, sz too! still! i was too preoccupied with my report s*** in lwn all the way until 7 den i took a shuttle down can. The stupid Can 4 zhi cai made us wait so long but we manage to get a discount for waiting for nearly 45 mins for our food. YA btw saw kel kel in the canteen too! for once! as usual hsien is full of crap together with his scaNdalous roomie weisong. It was only when duno isit tung who blurted out bout the swensen's ice cream cake. ARGHH!!!!! i nv eat ice cream cake b4 k! or not dat i remembered la den i was quite taken aback. SO SWEET! But why did the candle drop and i cudnt clear all the candles @ 1 shot!! And Sz's card is so mushy!! Gary's card was full of blurry words. muahaha n tung fergot to bring their combine card. Yayaya. Den @ nite recieve alot of well wishes & yuling+kx even gave me a candle on choc heart shape donut at bt 12+ am which i took a tiny bite n kept the rest for next morning. No wonder when i went in her room she looked horrified. i thot she was afraid that i caught her with donut dun wan share, ok this is dumb. YA and the candle got extinguished by my room fan!!! Stupid dennis n benny also called to tok cork abit. On 12th still doing lab lor den got malay so after dat actually dabao liang mian from canteen A n watch "meet the spartans" with 亮 boy on my lappie! Thank you baby for the lovely cheese cake~ Den @ nite hazel actually drop by with a very sweet card. ThankS "king of wishful thinkings"( u all really lyk my sleeping photo alot hor??) ya but its still a period of extreme low-ness so its kinda weird when extreme foul mood meets happy moments, canot comprehand everything @ 1st hand properly. But now that im writing bt it.. Im so loved >< @ ECP on sat, me n rj were saying next time go to the live pub there to drink den can juz pitch tent dere str8! Wanted to stay lehz but canot cos monday report deadline. den tung, yh n sz next day got race. But it was still very fun. Sz was very bad mood but dunoe why. Ya can u juz say Wad isit anot~~ everytime bad mood always kip it to urself. MAy u get FAT one day due to all ur bottled up feelings. Humph. & SO PROUD OF u all for winning X-phsique overall champs!!!! I can only imagine hw happy sz must be.
*

ok YA and back to ECP, i really loved the PUG shirt!!! i ALWAYS wanted one but i haven really been shopping since I DUNO WHEN. Thank YOU dear grace n zh the most thotful shoppers! Dint expect a ripcurl cos i nv own one b4 but i think im liking it more everytime i see it! Good eye di~ Know why i wanted a sweater not! cos can wear often den when i wear i wil remember all the lurveeee that's in it. YAYAYA~~ ECP that day yh pick me, tung, sz n ws from JE den Gary,grace, zh, rene, ruyan was already @ ECP. Ya gary dun sad k~~ u also tend to fall into the pit. oh us poor final yrs tormented by the cruelity of pre-grad syndromes. orh den still got mike, mark and jovin. Ok bananaman i think u sud stop calling me aunty PQ n call me PQ jie jie. I think tung is younger/ feels younger. muahaha.. OK its time to CHIONG. i mean with the music n all, SWIM in another say..5 days' time & BOULDER. its been too long..

March 5 - Recap on Endau Rompin

2008-03-05T14:58:00.048+08:00

Its been so long since i last blogged. I've been wanting to do so but juz dint manage to put my mind to it. Neverthless i would very much lyk to pen down my experience @ endau! Weee~!!!!

Recess break(22-24 Feb): Many thanks to fisherman WEISI for organising Endau Rompin. Despite the fact that many ppl pulled out last minute, it was still one of my best trips eva. Endau was beauuuutiful with splendid falls and alot of fishes to fight for every scaps of bread that was thrown into the water. The serenity was juz perfect. I needed to recharge myself, get away from the city. Im soooooooo happy that mark, zh, ws, kerui were able to share the joy with me. Well i guess i nv fail to enjoy small crowds n good company. The train ride there was quite a rush cos stupid zh came so late he almost missed us. Den on the train me n ws was trying to find our Bekok stop cos rj(the only one who went endau b4) cudnt come. After dropping off, me n goondu fiserman went to topo around to find the dorm. After calling moo moo, we manage to solve the mystery. Went back to the chi shop for SEDAP hokkien mee supper! The first nite's bridge in the dorm was darn fun(while kerui n gang were snoring away)! I manage to avoid being the weakest link (yet) with zh the "cai niao" (no pun intended) around to cover up for me. muahaha. But cudnt slp that nite, duno why. MArk was snoring lyk some pig, woke zh up abit with my fidgeting, ws was doing alot of duno wad on the upper deck also. But lest i got lyk 3hrs of rest. Not too bad. Next morning Mark cudnt stop complaining about how cold it was. But was it? hehe. Zh also think i was cold from the deduction of my baby curled up slping pose (same for mark can).

After lousy meehoon but a yummy prata later, we hop on the rocky 4 wheel drive to the campsite @ Lubuk Tapah. Darn it was a ROCKY ride, sudnt haf eaten so much. Cunt slp cos i was afraid i will scream myself awake when i fly n hit the roof of the rover. ZZZZ... Wanted to puke when we finally reach the campsite in an hr's time. But being the environmental ME and to avoid total embarrassment, i've decided that it was too much of a sin to waste the food so i juz maintain my poise. The hut was CLean and and the water was clear. it was quite heavenly liao, so every nerve in my body was looking forward to wad lies up ahead.

Was sweating lyk some shit as we transverse up. Cudnt believe the amt of fat i was burning purely by walking. Kerui was so zai she was carrying the day pack right behind the guide, followed by Mark, zh,me n weisi. The rest of the girls were behind. Can hear my own heartbeat drumming in my ears as sweat trinkle down my forehead. When we reach some rocky mossy parts, i was quite scared dat i will fall n die. As usual, i take awhile to warm up to the rhythme of the trek as well. Here's our first rest point:

The first waterfall (Takah Tinggi) was COLD but not as FREEZING as the 2nd one. Notice the steepness b4 reaching the fall. Had fun trying to go up this boulder. The feeling of real rocks really beats the bouldering walls in ntu. Makes me wonder about gg Krabi... Zh looks v furni with his beanie/bandena over his head. "Abit gay" as others quoted. I shall not name names. Muahaha.. check him out in the 3rd pic below. You'll get wad i mean.

There were alot of hungry fishes in the water.. WS was freaked out cos when he swam away they were literally following him lyk some vultures to meat. muahaha.. They were cracking jokes bt rj again about how/where he'll get eaten up. Rj are u sneezing lyk crazy by now? Princess quoted this pic as "Dancing Zhenhan?". Looks quite lyk it~

The way up the 2nd waterfall was quite treacherous. 60° slope with a dayback that i kop from kerui (good buddies must share load theory), i almost wanted to die. Ws @ the back kip wanting to take over but i insisted on reaching the top in the same state as i come. Yippie it was a super downslope b4 reaching the 2nd waterfall (Takah Pandan). The fall was relatively smaller than the first n the water was bone rackingly cold. But boh song that after all that upslope dun go down the water so the brave princess, me n ws manage to capture a(n ugly) shot in the water. We actually took a diff route back but it was fun nevertheless.

Thou shall not touch too much on dinner esp we had so much food leftover. But good job kr,ws n zh for taking over the stoves. Joo i miss ur cooking!! And i miss having dose non-fussy poopheads lyk tungboy, gary, munir, yaya etc who juz eats wadeva that comes. aLways manage to clear all stocks @ the end of the day. I LYK. haha.. nitetime everybody too tired to go c the guide teach us how to spear the fishes so it was bathe and BRIDGE! This time i was the weakest link!! Cudnt remember my partner, dint oberserve the cards, bad decisions. hahaha crappy loh can~ Cudnt slp again. zzz had nitemares in fact. The next day all woke up late so dint had time to cook (yippe!) and ate at the shop by the train station again. Quite grumpy in the morning and DL with ppl who dun eat this dun eat that but eat sth dat looks nice. IRRITATED. Even more chui when i kana trashed again on the train ride back to singapore. I SUCK AT Bridge!!! MUST PRACTISE MORE. muahaha.. Princess K calls us the "bridging freaks" cos we play wheneva we can~

Back in JB, the dang gui ya was delicious. Unfortunately for zh, ws n mark who were lao-sai-ing that nite, i was fine. Muahahahaaa mark says my tummy is a monster. But i guess im too used to LS-ing so this time i was spared the agony. hehe.. Endau Rox! Totally dint understand why the review for this place was so bad last time. haha muz be the ppl leading~~ Oh i wish the rest of u yr 4s/ final years cud be there too.. +rj+tung.

Good times r rare but im lucky to have more den a few

Jan 20- Lab rat

2008-01-20T03:49:00.000+08:00

There's this sci-fi thriller "CUBE" that was shown on tv think last yr. Its about this 7-9 ppl waking up one day in this white room/cube. On every side of the cube is a window. But, out of any window u crawl into is the same room. Sometimes u can get laser-ed/ implode according to the "dimension's" liking. Creepy shit. Today, i feel like one of the characters stuck in the unknown & potentially hazardous dimension (ok la for me its NTU N4.1). In the morning here @ nite here n now morning again still here! @ nite in lab hear weird weird noises feels abit lyk Dawn of the Dead. Something is waiting outside for me.. Paranoid!!! But heng juz now still can go back hall have lunch n dinner & watch my "Xiu Cai Yu Zhao Bing". Else today is really a very not exciting day. When can i get out of it!! From v sleepy till now im actually blogging. Another 4 more hours & it'l be 24hrs awake! Saya lapar! oh woah its 4.15am le. Finally. Time to go!

Jan 8- Final Sem D2

2008-01-08T23:30:00.000+08:00

Oh man final sem has creeped in on us! (me, gary,sz,yali...) its finally here! i said "bring it on" on D1, and by end of D2, im worn out lyk a rag doll. ARGHHHHH.. (to be continued.. )

Anyway~Was feeling dam sian on sunday when i was working, suddenly people juz disgust me. I juz dint had joy in "bao-ing" my coffee n serving tea, while i often embrace this part time job cos after a day of labor u juz go back home n sleep. No need to think so much. Hate it when ppl give the look when the milo ice is not full becos it lacks an ice. God plz the cup is lyk godzilla size u wan i can add more water. Unhappy can juz say dun need to give each other "the look". I was so disgruntled i juz dint wan to pop in the extra ice o r blardy add in another 2ml of H2O. Humans disgust me. At least on sunday morning. Wasnt feeling any beta when i heard mom say dad's health is not too danny lately. Its time lyk this i wish im home more. Anyhow, had a sweaty time walking to robertson walk but think Yali is happy with everything so im glad. HAPPY BURFDAy baby! u deserve a little pampering (-_-) wu~~ Pan’s Labyrinth is so good~ The movie is really a labyrinth of mystical fantasy & morbid s***. Particularly loved the eyes on palms stunt. Very creative~ Itssssssssssssssssss so our next photo taking pose. Juz love nuahing & let the movie bring you into another realm & u dun nid to think bout anything else for that 2hrs. YEAH~ (weisi will say i nid rehab)

Final Sem D1. skipped 2 lectures n went swimming with gary, sz n tung boy. Think its actually the 1st time i see em @ the pool. Actually i was quite nuah sai but in the end still went cos WHO KNOWS WHEN'S THE NEXT TIME WE ALL CAN SWIM TOGETHER~~~~~ zzz why muz wait until final sem~~~bleah. Wuhu~~ meanwhile as gary, me n sz soaked ourselves in tanning oil n bake in the sun, tung stayed in the water as he already had his FABULOUS "FABULOUS" tan so no nid lyk us all crowding round @ the corner of the pool trying to let the sun eat into every ounce of our bleached skin. oh so happy den was all photo taking action walking around sch in the odac tees lyk some youngsters trying to show we rule the LT as i crash their HP801 lect. After a MAc dinner it was hall sweet hall. My 1st nite with ry as roomie!! but suddenly when im usually the latest to bed ry is behaving lyk me in yr 1. Late nite jogs with supper outings. so havoc~~ However since im so hardworking on D1 i was doing some reading (which i dun normally do until 5 weeks after sch starts), i saw this horrendous mistake dat i made with my presentation last week, my mood went down down down. Thankz kel kel for trying to cheer me up ( & who even manage to catch the slightest hint of my foul mood). Best fren~~~ i treat u eat ice cream cone tmr.

(Continued..) Final Sem D2. Ya why today is so bad cos nicknamed "lab nemesis" by weisi, i juz cudnt not make something go rite in lab can I? Cant believe the knob on the SEM m/c came off!! & all the X-rays dat diffuse thru me!!! im gg to die!!!! :~( Felt lyk NOTHING WAS GG rite. not even when i had the faintest smell of success. Wadeva it is, i had my fave meatball soup from can 2 with weisi & caught sz n grace(they go do gym~). Den while waiting for bus back, sz told me to read gary's blog wad cry on the bed whole nite duno wad?!? OMG! im so not gg to publicly announce to the whole world bt me crying (even if i did!!). But the only time i felt so fine crying was @ the end of FOOT 07 when the 11th main commers hugged together n lyk taps, tears juz flood. Somehow the sudden thot of it makes me feel all beta, all the good/bad moments we shared. And dat time stupid gary juz ran off to help the log ppl instead of wallowing in sorrow with us. Must be go sweep floor n CRY into his sleeve on his own. Cockster.

Oh man, when i told shirly i spoiled the sem m/c she laughed. wth. And by nite time even lorny knew. zzz... I will still do lab no matter wad. HA!

And bad aura? You can shoo off !! Cos 咖啡王子 1 号店 is here to lift my spirits~ TV TIME! Watch out for the podcast advert by Don & Drew on "My Sister's Cat"!!!! Two thumbs up. Again again!!

Life =/= Study

2007-11-19T17:59:00.000+08:00

Hahahahaa,, juz finished my 3rd paper. 1/2 way thru liao 3 more paper to go. Things' been a breeze i call it. Think im past the gaga over paper feeling. i juz started cramming 2 days ago n today i "bome" everything out. Wad i know i can give, wad i don't i juz dunoe la. Yuling has been relentlessly coming in/calling/msg-ing to check on me past few days. NAH! i dun nid this!!! And so happen when she come in im either spider solitare-ing/ watching "名厨上菜" downloaded from mobTV. Thank god Mark tong come n study with me. Erm not mug together but juz physically here n conduct restraining order when i exceed my tv hours. Such a good man even offer to buy me food b4 exam can. But im already delirious n lack of appetite b4 paper. Muahahahaaa.. But we sabo each other la. i sent him this really gay yen link: http://shingakunet.com/special/10054301/0285/index.html n he spents all day trying to figure out the configuration. The next day he found another website similar to this & repeat the same sequencing. Meanwhile i juz cant get my eyes off the screen & my fingers clicking away furiously in desperate attempts to solve uncountable games of spider. Machiam lyk if i dun complete the game i will not do well for paper lykdat. In the back of my mind im thinking: " roomie where r u shopping or attending wedding dinner @ today? So bloody slack. PIG."

Basically im not studying much. Wad's wrong with me? Too much tv got me thinking bt future career options. Something bigger den exams. Chef maybe? Haha i geniuely have an interest in this field can~ I knew very long ago i was not cut out to be an engineer. But uni taught me alot of stuff outside text. All the human relations, cat fights and politics. Its everywhere man, 从头发到呼吸. And lyk everyone else including myself who believes there's no 1 here really worth knowing, im surprised with the bonds i had made with some of the ppl i met here. I wouldnt change a thing becos i have had the chance to cross their path. YEAH~ Lyk wad siang ping said ytd morning when he drop by to visit: " Its sad when u work u cant choose ur collegues, unlike your frens." OMG almost fergot to mention, he purposely grab my attention to tell me in his fake serious tone : "wow peiqin i must say ur complexion really improved alot, at least from this angle". SMS, dat time the 1st n last thing siew sze said to me is also this. After dat they juz end off asking for my doc's no. Muahaha... let sz go do his face 1st la! Den we can compare which doc beta.

Ya and back to the topic rite, i must say i have "sinned" becos in one point i have trusted some1 else more den the mate we started out together. Since my 教训, which explains why i've been quite down in the start of the semester, made me see the light. I will place my trust in you. (yucks this sounds so wrong! anyhow->continue) I think you know who u r la since all the big mouths around me confirm will tell u. Not that becos i knew u earlier therefore everything u say is more justified den the other but that you are packed with goodwill (i dun hav 1/2 ur 好心肠)and has a firm n objective view about things. Many times i'll rather believe in the decision u make becos i know the amount of thot u have put into it is something that probably will not have crossed my mind. And due to this incident, i knew for certain ppl, my trust will not be misplaced. When not too long ago a misunderstanding re: gan renjian with the 12th comm juz pop out from nowhere, it dint cross my mind dat he haboured selfish intention in the cause he wanted to bring across. Despite i dint know the details of the expedition, i knew that he's more honourable a man den many others. Thus, i dint hesistate to say dat i believe rj dint mean to undermine any1 becos he's juz not some1 who'll do such a thing. Im glad i dint hold back this time. Y.EAH~ This remind me of the good times i have with my 11th comm. HEre's a video from our dinner at Hotel Rendezvous for a laugh:

Anyway, i've been questioning myself why m i studying something i dont even have a passion for. But passion do run out when u start doing anything u enjoy seriously rather den for leisure. I mean i wouldnt mind spending all my time on books if 1) i enjoy the subject 2) i seriously gain super high utility mugging den anything else WHICH I SIMPLY DONT. Well, juz hope my dad will not go gaga if i dun end up in my field after i grad. Its really the years of transition in NTU dat makes me wad i m now. I cant imagine gg out to work str8 after poly/jc. I think my train of thought wud still be very immature. Regarding my siao zabor mannerisms now, i just choose to behave this way becos i cant stand conformity.

Tried to do some pumping cos whole bod really is more nuah den i thot. NO climb, no run, no swim for lyk a month! im gg nuts! Watched ep 3 of Full Metal Alchemist last thurs at sz's (while tung boy snores nearby), the line " To train ur mind, you must first train your body" really strike a cord. I MUST EXERCISE!!!! The urge to be become stronger results in chronic shoulder ache. TMD all my climbing went to waste again!! Muscle ache is the first sign dat i have no back muscles to begin with. Dam the school go n lock up the climbing wall 害 me wanted to sneak in but yali din't want us getting expelled in our final year... Fine fine~~ BOring. My shoes is rotting under my bed in the ziplock bag. Crying out to me. Think will jio a few ppl go yishun safra aircon boulder gym after exam. So sianz still coughing after one week of flu. Cant even enjoy a shot of volka with the wadeva juices i hav left in my fridge. ARGGGHHH. WASTED. All these rainy nites is simply the best excuse to indulge. *brrr...

ARGH!!! nitemare b4 meeting

2007-10-08T20:52:00.000+08:00

I thot i moved one step further,,,, but kns, im actually two steps back!! FTIR test chwee! Broke my sample when i only got one piece for my 6mmol conc. de. FUGGG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Thot at least got 2 test results now only got 1. Buay tahan juz now kept accidentally deleting the graph cos my gloves too big, hand movement got clumsy. NO~!~ how am i to face joachim on the coming wed.... doom man. So... sud i adopt the (1) Act dumb act stupid (2) Act Smart (3) Act "kelian"- afterall dere was alot of delay from my own numerous bludders. Dat's why i say i spend soooo much time in lab cos i kip doing the stuff wrong (due to myself/irritating ppl/lousy m/c). This activity is NON MORALE-BOOSTING. Kana caught by a phd student after i went back to lab after the MM Lee Forum --> "why r u here at this hour? You know u not suppose to come? Later u die inside nobody know how?.........(yak x3)" OMG~~ Made me scared to go back at nite to do lab cos later kana banned. muahahaha..

This cat really screams "Dun mess with me cos im DA boss here"

PQ reporting from NTU hall 3: Oh man.. there's a alcohol craze now! more n more young adults are quoted getting addicted to getting light-headed, free flow laughter & associated "happy" sydromes. Next door neighbor Y mentioned she bought this nice beer from Denmark. The usual me misinterpretated the name of the alcohol wrongly.. from "pu bor-->tu bor-->turbo" (sth lyk dat). OMG~ *outbreak streaks of laughter from the floor of 3 other carefree souls... Ya i feel lyk having a tiny sip or two right now.. (*coughs)

FYP a.k.a. e monster in my closet

2007-10-05T14:29:00.000+08:00

It's been a fugging lousy start when i embarked on my fyp after the devastating "I dint do anything yet" reply to my sup during the bi-weekly meeting on that fateful 12th Sept. Everyone stunned for 5 seconds (4 others:same group but its individual work de, Jaime:mentor & Joachim:sup). With that, i was determined to make a change.

I was scared to start cos i was clueless. Haha everyone in that lab seem 2 have finished 3/4 wadeva they were doing la so it was darn shit when i go in & ppl juz think that u'r mad to hav only started. Peer pressure i call it. It was a bumpy start when i accidentally broke a thermometer & caused the lab to close for 3 days. It was a crazy BIG WHOOHA lor. Machiam lyk SARS ppl wear astronaut's gear to clear the scene. ZzzZ. The phd students muz have hated me. Dat was SOoo not helpful. Becos of that i cudnt start my experiment. Delay. I HATED IT. I was so frustrated with myself. But turns out, all the keeping everything to myself, forcing myself to make things work out alone DINT work out. It all changed after i went for an SEM training & the lab tech mentioned this line :"Ppl nowadays all so self-centre. Dun wan to share. FYP is impt to do, review & discuss". I dint wana reach out not because i dun wana share but i had nuthin to show or share i dint wana bring others down.

After dat day, I realised i was being stupid la. Its time to be proactive & juz make the first moves. Dat's what fyp is all about. So, when i miracously saw my mentor in lab(so hard to spot her!), I literally grabbed her & force her to review my calculations. Dun care whether i was juz an idiot (she was exasperated at that point trying to etch the theory into my teeny brain) but i made sure i get it right once n for all. Embarrassed? Nah, it's not even worth a cent. Consecutively, I talked to my group mates about my own experiences n ask em bt theirs. Through discussion, i realised dat i wasn't alone in this. Some shared the same anxiety to produce results & fear of wad, blowing up the lab during experiment? It was enlightening how i cud know so much so long i ask. Even dou our experiment is all different, but there's still so much we can learn from knowing each other's difficulties & deduce sth useful from dere. Else every1 juz thinks evry1 else is doing good when we are all in fact juz the same. Quote the line : Same same but different. ya we got different nitemares la (laughs)

I must say it was overwhelming at some point when i cant get things done & fatigue sneaks in on me, dat i was practically living in the lab 12/5. Oh year 4 sux but i also love the fact dat im moving closer n closer to wad i wana achieve. Trying to head towards the legandary "Year 4 zai" title. It's gg to feel SO DARN GOOD when i finally finish this(fyp) off. Muahaha.. I sincerely thank my dearest roomie for her support during this difficult time. Showering me with love when im down & worrying constantly whether i had died while doing lab when she doesnt see me physically in the room by 11pm. Worried bt me gg to lab alone in the wee hours(cos its so farking creepy at the basement lift), I was escouted to lab in the company of yaya & joo on 1 nite. *I was really touched* Despite i left em in the computer lab to play & i went back up to lab to do my stuff, they waited an hr+ for me to finish & we left together victorious. They juz watch videos lor despite they were suppose to be doing work. keke. Anyhow, here's an update on my current status-:

Things destroyed in my hands so far:
1) 1 x mercury thermometer
2) 1 x three-neck flask

Things i gained:
1) notorious "chwee gia" record in the lab but hey, they all noe me now!
2) understanding dat sharing is GOOD FOR ALL (i totally embrace helping out one another man now, im glad i had the opportunity to be in a group rather den being attached 1-1 to other sup)

a very slippery monday

2007-09-10T10:38:00.000+08:00

omg. year 4 already still so chwee. quiz at 0900hrs, i woke up at 6.30am both eyes droopy den study my 4520 until 7.30 went to bathe n go down eat breakfast. Stupid singtel network haiz me canot reach lornie so i attempt to flag a cab to ntu str8. however, due to too many competitors, too many 'niao' blue cabs that is "ON CALL" & it started to drizzle, i had to call for cab. CHWEEE!!! call 5 cab companies all canot call thru. I was a damsel in distress~~

Now, im in lwn, at 10.43 suffering from post quiz sydrome.
Went in late nvmind sit in 1st row even worse. Boo hoo hoo. Wana see if i got my facts correctly after paper i chk my notes also not sure wana ask my frens but all of em got the "bor chap liao since its over" seh, i got no means to fill up my voids!! *感到空虚* Rememberin ytd the alfred in 塘心风暴 mentioning bout when ppl unhappy they write. yeah man a good way to let out my overflowing emos. This got me started to write my very first entry. Had this blog@ since lyk dec 2006 cos i wanted to write bout my enjoyable RAT dry run with rene, jeremy n eugene but since it's suppose to be secret so i canot reveal anythin which the photos could explain beta den my words. Shall post it on a later note.